The Growth Zone
In the past 6 months, I’ve moved out of my Comfort Zone through to the Fear Zone. The Fear Zone has been a really tough one for me to overcome. Until this point, I feel like I’ve been stuck in the Fear Zone. Fear of the unknown, fear of what I want to do, what I believe in. Fear of putting myself out there in hopes that my team feels inspired enough to follow my lead. Fear of failing miserably and waking up one day thinking this crazy ride was all just a dream.
At this point, I am teetering between the learning zone and the growth zone. I am knee-deep in learning how to become a “leader”. This is a huge learning curve for me. I’ve never actually been a “leader” in the literal sense of the word. I’ve never led big teams of people, stood on stage to kick off a meeting with hundreds of people staring at me (aside from my own high school graduation), done performance reviews, talked about career goals and aspirations of others aside from my own, so all of this is very new to me. I feel like I am starting a new sport for the first time, and it feels awkward but amazing. I am acquiring so many new skills but formal and informal. I find myself reflecting back to so many pivotal moments in my career and bosses, mentors, colleagues, partners, candidates, teachers, friends, and the list goes on. So many experiences I have to draw from to paint a picture of huge, messy learnings throughout my career. One thing that stands out about these memories was the fact that I was always drawn to the leaders who didn’t have to be called a specific title or sit in a specific office or be included in a specific meeting. The leaders that resonated with me, were the ones who were with me, in the day to day, listening to the gripes, and listening to the struggles, with no hint of ego or all-knowing attitude. The leaders that inspired me were the ones that challenged me to dig deeper, and they never gave me the answer. These leaders pushed me to think about things from a different perspective and to talk through things until I came to my own conclusions. These leaders taught me how to be resilient and keep going even when things were not going well. To learn from these hard times, tough clients, unrelenting requisitions that I thought I would never fill or that hiring manager who was so rude or demoralizing. These leaders trusted me. They believed in me even when I was unproven. They gave me an opportunity and just waited to see what happened.
After 17 years, I am still in the learning zone, but I know I am also in the growth zone. I finally feel ready. I feel like I’ve found my purpose. I am ready to conquer objectives, set big, huge, lofty goals, and live my dreams. And finally, now is my time to inspire those around me to do the same.
